Success Stories in Your Community

“I don’t know where my life and the lives of my children are going, but I know it’s going to be much better.”

Ian has been through some tough times. So have his five children.

“I grew up with parents who were addicts, but I still managed to graduate from high school,” Ian says with pride. Looking for a new experience, he moved to Utah. After a few years, he met and married a woman with three children. A year later his first child was born. But soon after, he and his wife were doing meth, bouncing between jobs, and barely getting by.

“We had to change, get out of the cycle. So we moved to Portland and started over. Life was going well until one day my wife didn’t come home. She’d been arrested and extradited back to Utah for a six-month jail term. I managed to take care of the kids until she was released.”

After her release, their lives went well. They’d quit drugs, had good jobs, his wife was attending college, and another child was born. But the dark side of the cycle returned. He lost his job after a few years, they got hooked on drugs again, and one morning at 5:00 a.m., everything changed. Police raided their home for drugs, arrested both of them, and put the children into protective custody.

“If there’s anything that woke me up and changed my life, it was the day I was arrested in front of my children. I’d been their protector, their dad. And they had to watch as police with guns handcuffed me for my stupid mistakes. I was filled with grief and shame.”

Ian began a long process of cleaning himself up and learning that the system was not his enemy. Family services, the legal system, and even his judge really were there to protect the children, and he wanted and needed that help. As he continued on his journey of recovery, the court steadily granted him more time with his children. Eventually he gained full custody, and he adopted the children his now ex-wife had brought into their marriage.

“It wasn’t easy. Being the dad to five kids, the only way I could do it was with the support of the community. I needed help, and my community was there for us. I needed to talk and learn from other parents going through the same nightmare. I found what I needed.”

Through Volunteers of America, he began to volunteer to run the Parents Helping Parents support group. That work introduced him to the Center for Family Success, where he connected with the Girl Scout’s Beyond Bars program and Big Brothers/Big Sisters. Impressed with his energy and strong motivation to change his life and take good care of his children, the Center hired him to work with their clients.

“While I was helping other parents—as many as 50 families—these groups were helping our children to become healthier people, better equipped to deal with life.”

“And that’s when United Way came through. As a group of agencies working on a specific social problem, United Way selected us for three-year funding. Now our programs can really take off! The United Way funds have made it possible to build a one-stop place for children and adults to get help, to get their questions answered, and to succeed.”

Ian has been clean for four years now. He’s working fulltime, going to college to become a certified drug and alcohol counselor, and playing an active in the lives of his children. He stays in close with their teachers, participates in the PTA, and is very proud when he tells you that his kids are doing “awesome” in school.

But he’s quick to point out that it isn’t just he alone who helps them succeed. Because of this program and others, his children get a fair chance.

Like Ian said, it takes a community to raise a family, and United Way funds are a critical part of ensuring our community does its job well.

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